Earth As An Echo Chamber.

The world has an interesting sense of humor,

You think you’ve seen much of what it has to offer

Till the universe pulls you out of your Faraday box

Introducing you to those incapable of understanding

Simple acts of kindness.

– O.D. ©2020

Art by: aerroscape

Mind Reading Error.

Deep down, I like to think of myself as a good person.

So I’ll do you a favor and save you the trouble

Of trying desperately to trace my shadow.

No matter how many times you try and tell me who I am;

You’re wrong.

– O.D. ©2020

Art by: CaringWong

Unpopular opinion: You can never know someone to the core; you don’t even know yourself. So to think you can narrow someone’s personality to your limited perception of them is a little stupid moronic idiotic foolish ridiculous …don’t you think?

But what do I know, I’m just a guy who loves writing.

Undulating.

Proclaiming shamelessly that those who commit suicide are weak

Beckons me to give you news that will split your mind in three.

The good: Today, you learn something new.

The bad: You get to learn that you were far smarter a second ago;

Far smarter in fact, before deciding to lampshade the mushroom cloud;

The mushroom cloud that is ….

The ugly: … Your overbearing ignorance.

– O.D. ©2020

Art by: CaringWong

People who attempt suicide are not weak, they are in psychological pain and are in need of help. You may think it’s irrational for someone to end their life when looking from the perspective of someone who has yet to go through similar pain. And how could you? We’re all different.

Suicide is an act that comes from pain, not weakness. People that attempt/ commit suicide are in fact afraid to die. But the pain they will be going through will be so overwhelming that they see no other way to stop it. I understand how easy it may be for some people to judge and make light of someone else’s pain. After all, I grew up being told the remedy for being depressed was to simply “cheer up” and to stop being “so sensitive, like a lady”

“You’re feeling depressed? But you’re so young, Wait till you’re an adult then you’ll know what true depression is”

True depression? What the f*ck is that bullsh*t? Like there’s some kind of absolute depression that blankets all other forms of depression. F*cking morons, the lot of them. If you have no knowledge to impart because you don’t understand a particular issue well — or rather, if you have nothing constructive to offer, Have the decency to keep your mouth shut.

What pisses me off is how many people commit suicide because they are afraid to open up to all these judgy idiots. These idiots who feel they have suffered more than anyone else. How many more people would we be able to help if these idiots weren’t so flippant about how they address issues regarding suicide? I don’t like cursing, but this issue really gets me heated.

I never told my parents this story (only my sister) because I was afraid they would worry. But at the start of 2020 I was flooded by suicidal thoughts. My poetry did nothing to hide this. I don’t need to get into the particulars of how it reached that point, but, well, everything sucked. It’s like, try as I might, when looking all around me, all I saw were ways I could kill myself in the least painful way.

These thoughts are “gone”now but I know they could just as easily come back. I’m at a point in my life where I no longer know if I’m depressed or not. Take that however you wish, but it has helped me empathize with those in pain. I may not know exactly what they are going through, but I’ve felt and understood a similar pain in my own unique way. And i’ll try, in any way I can to give them a listening ear, and if my writing lights up their day, even better.

But much like everyone else, I have good and bad days; and that is, at times, reflected in my writing. Despite trying to help others, I need to make time to help myself; and this might mean writing a piece that carries little to no positivity.

I believe in helping people help themselves, not saving. Fostering self-reliance; not co-dependency. I’m a teacher, not a cult leader.

The Maker’s Star Seed.

I looked into the abyss and lived to tell you all about it

Didn’t leave unscathed though, take a look at my heart —

Notice the battle scars — how they embellish over my blood pump

With the subtlety of post-war badges.

God penned the dots in my eyes with the cosmic strength of black holes

Rarely — if ever —do words escape the pull of my gaze.

I am a star-eyed dragon, the kind you find hidden in the pages of a book long forgotten

With each word I write, I light a fire —when I speak, I light an unseen pyre,

Averting the gaze of those trapped inside the darkness.

See, most people would rather spend a majority of their lives

Waiting eagerly for their genius to be verified.

… and of course; you’d be right in thinking,

I’m not one of them.

– O.D. ©2020

Art by: CaringWong

I’m a complete idiot and I love it.

The Safety Of My Mind’s Prison.

Love?

I understand love

As the willingness

To eventually get hurt.

– O.D. ©2020

Art by: Gydw1n

Drizzles, Giggles And A List Of Life’s Riddles.

When you see someone fall,

Don’t laugh.

We’re all falling; you’re no better,

For simply falling slower.

– O.D. ©2020

Art by: Gydw1n

Finite-State Machine.

There was no we,

Only what she needed me to be.

– O.D. ©2020

Art by: Gydw1n

Kindling For A Falling Bridge.

I suppose thinking you would stay stuck in the past

Was a little too much to ask,

You surface to the top of my current thoughts

With the dark and oozy persistence

Of an off-shore oil spill.

— You’re unwanted,

You kill the formation of my ideas often,

Your idea of living comes off to me as foreign

Your understanding of bonding bears the likeness

Of a grassy field at the periphery of erosion.

I won’t hide the bad thoughts I have when I think of you

I hold my values and speak only what I believe to be true

I don’t expect, nor hope, that you’ll hear my words and agree

I only empty my lungs, exorcising your flimsy demon out of me.

The radical would say you’re straddling satanic

You? Hardly.

I’d settle for simply calling you moronic —

— Idiotic, as you preach mindfulness from the comfort of an invisible pulpit

The sole of your shoes bound to the rustic pedestal of a f*cking narcissist.

Don’t tell me about language

If you paid attention you’d know I’ve since had it.

Go ahead, flatter yourself into thinking I wrote this for you.

Please, I dare you. Chug it all down.

Soon after, pay no mind to the sensation of your insides forming lesions,

Tends to happen when you try and digest the sharpness of a wit you can’t fathom.

I write — I breathe, life into each piece

It’s a hard tilt — unfiltered by my loyalty to the path of a creative

No experience of mine is beyond comodifying,

— Liquidating and displaying on a fine sheet of paper.

As such, you and the lint that was our tether

Will be of further use in lining my passion as a writer.

There are no good or bad choices

Only regrets,

When it comes to those — I have many

But the kindling offered by our shared experience

Assures you’ll never reach the worth of being one.

– O.D. ©2020

Art by: Gydw1n

Three Ceilings Below.

A part of me longs to form a bond.

A bond so strong, It involuntarily phases in and out

Of the spiritual realm.

A bond, that makes death nothing more than a checkpoint;

Thereby materializing, growing ever-stronger in the hereafter.

A part of me sees this “longing”

As nothing but wishful thinking;

The floundering of a mad man anchored to the bottom

Of the deep blue sea –

Drowning, desperately trying to hold onto something –

Anything – to keep me afloat;

Leaning on “hope” to make this far-flung dream;

A reality.

– O.D. ©2020

Art by: Gydw1n  

The Nine Year Bender.

ddj47iq-e5d6cb98-52c0-478d-9cd0-ac0287f6bc7a.png

I don’t want

To live in a world

Where loving someone …

Is simply,

Not enough.

 

– O.D. ©2020

 

Art by: Gydw1n 

 

Back to abstract poetry. Getting those creative vibes flowing again.

If you missed it, I recently finished the unnamed girl series. A short six-part story I encourage you to check out if you enjoy story-telling and poetry all bundled up into one. Also because I worked real hard on it, it would not go unappreciated. Don’t forget to share your thoughts in the comments. You can check out all the parts here