A Series Of Unpopular Opinions (6)

A series of unpopular opinions. Share a thought, no matter how crazy or critique the ones other people have chosen to share. The point is to have fun provided we all keep an open mind and respect each others views. Healthy debates are welcome, extended discussions even more so.

<< Held (almost) every Friday >>

 

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(Note: These opinions are in no way reflective of my personal views or biases; just ones I think will spark interesting dialogue in the comment section):

 

Unpopular opinion #1 If a celebrity’s content wasn’t made for kids then don’t complain about them not being a good role model by u/shelbygirl1919

I was just looking at a post on instagram of Rihanna in her shear, sparkly dress that didn’t leave much to the imagination. I was going through the comments and so many people were complaing about how she shouldn’t be dressing like this because young girls look up to her.

But I mean, people, it’s Rihanna. Her songs talk about sex, drugs, money, relationships. You know, things that aren’t for children. She does not make music for children, therefore she should not be a rolemodel for children.

If you have such a problem with the way she conducts herself then maybe your children shouldn’t be listening or looking up to her anyway. You are the parents if you want your child to have a good role model send them in the direction of someone you want them to be like. And if that person isn’t someone like Rihanna, then don’t let them listen to Rihanna!

 

Unpopular opinion #2 Addiction to p*rn should be talked about more by u/RayLove660022

As a person who is addicted to watching porn (I’m trying hard to stop), I don’t feel like people believe me. People just say “it’s normal”, but I feel like if someone has an addiction, they should be helped. I’ve talked to my therapist about it, one of my social workers (I used to be a foster kid), and some of my family. They all seem to shrug it off. Nobody really wants to help me get over my addiction because it’s a forbidden topic.

Also, I know another person who went in front of his church and said “I have a porn addiction”, and and everyone gasped. People that are addicted to this stuff really need help.

So, that’s why I think porn should be talked about more.

 

Unpopular opinion #3 Gun safety and use should be taught young, and reinforced throughout early adulthood by u/fallingbear67

May be a biased opinion. I was in boy scouts, and learned fire arm safety, and use in my early teens. While I don’t think it should be mandatory, for a country that made gun ownership one of it’s rights, we certainly don’t educate our citizens very much on fire arm safety or use.

I would have loved to take a fire arm class in school. Maybe as an elective, or alternate to gym? Learn archery and fire arm use and safety? It could destigmatize a lot of negativity regarding fire arms in the US specifically.

 

Unpopular opinion #4 People should stick to their age when it comes to relationships by u/IsNoBlinksyIsNoFun

Now, call me a prude, but I really have a problem with relationships where one partner is older than the other – especially when one partner is significantly older than the other. Now I get it, people will always look at young people and go “wow, they’ve got it going on” – but there is a difference between looking and not touching and actively going out of your way to be involved with them. To me, it’s a MAJOR red flag is someone actually does this – especially if they have children that are of an age with that individual or (in the most worrying circumstances) actually older than the person they are interested it.

Obviously, you can just chalk it up to “hey what you like shouldn’t dictate what other people do”, and yeah, I get that. I understand the whole argument of what happens between two adults consentually is their business and not yours. But because two people are into one another and have the right to be together doesn’t mean that they should be. I know a lot of people see no issue with age gap relationships and just sit on the high horse of “they’re both adults so they know what they are doing” – I think this is very problematic reasoning as it excludes the fact that adults, no matter their age, can be manipulated and – more importantly – young people, though adults, often don’t think the way that adults do; especially if they don’t have a troubled upbringing. Young people tend to be impulsive and prefer to ‘live in the moment’.

Plus, there is also the core problem that exists in these kinds of relationships – the fact that the partners are at different life stages. Let’s take a hypothetic (yet horrifying common) example, a 21 year old gets into a relationship with a 45 year old. The younger partner has just started their life, they are going through a stage of self exploration, one which they can more than share with partners of their own age. A 45 year old isn’t in this situation. Their life is already established, they know themselves and have already gone through a stage of self exploration. They generally have plans of settling down (if they haven’t already) and are looking for establishing foundations for the rest of their life (again, if they haven’t already) – a young person (in most cases) isn’t looking for this and being involved with an older partner who wants this is going to unfairly force them to skip a whole stage of their life.

We see time and time again that age gap relationships fall apart in the vast majority of instances specifically because the younger partner feels trapped by the older partner. Sometimes the younger partner is fortunate and manage to get out before they are trapped into a life stage they aren’t ready for… and sometimes the younger partner isn’t fortunate and end up getting out of the relationship with a child (or more) in tow. This isn’t just bad for the younger partner, it’s also bad for the older partner. The older partner has lost years that they could have spent with a partner of their own age and have lost valuable time to establish their future.

The whole situation becomes worse then the older partner already has a family. In these situations the relationships in the vast majority of cases cause major relationship issues within the family. Especially when it involves the younger partner being of an age with their partner’s children or younger. The amount of times I see posts on here or articles concerning children falling out with their parents because they in a relationship with or married to a partner who is a few years older or younger than they are or – in the most extreme circumstances – are decades younger.

 

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9 Replies to “A Series Of Unpopular Opinions (6)”

  1. Totally agree about large age differences in relationships. My ex husband is “only” 9 years older and that ended up being a problem. I can’t imagine how 20 years or more would go. Young enough to be your child? Nope!

    1. I agree with the 20 years difference one. But im curious to know how a 10 or 5 year difference could be bad? The original poster of the comment raised some interesting points regarding growth and how the older person would be robbing the younger one of that growth. Im wondering if there’s any other reason its not okay🤔

      1. How do we go past the difficulties associated with dating in our age group? Im not speaking for me personally, but overall. Because most ladies tend to mature much faster and seek men far older than their age group.

        And then you’ve got some insecure men looking to a lower age group to feel more in control. It seems there might not be a way to bridge these differences. Its quite an ordeal.

  2. Addicted to porn? There should be a 12 step program for that. Step one: Admitted I am addicted to porn and my life has become unmanageable. If it is an addiction it should be treated as other addictions are treated. Addictions are serious and can destroy a persons life and the lives of others around them. Porn is up there with meth, heroin, and gin!! Pernicious!

    1. You’re right Anne. When I was in uni I once knew a guy who was discovered to be holding 30GB of porn. He would download using the residence wifi (which was capped by the way)

      He was called to the admin office because whenever the residence wifi would be up and running. Data would finish in a matter of hours with how much he downloaded. Pernicious indeed.

  3. On a personal tip the age gap in relationships depends on ones emotional and sexual needs (i think) i for one did not date women my age because of the intelligence gap i found them shallow n lulewarm in both company and temperament… I preferred older women because they were more appreciative of my attention

  4. On the issue of porn addiction people really think its unlikely for someone to be addicted but its a real thing its more common than u might think… And they suffer in silence coz ur first reaction is disbelief then disgust then denial…

  5. And thank you to Dante for this platform ive been following it for sometime as a silent observer and really great job fam

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